"I am not good at joining the problem, that is because I am busy brainstorming for a solution." Chioma Onwudiwe
I am a little upset right now. Actually, out with it. I am a lot upset! There seems to be a combined conspiracy out there, to confuse me. Everything is so jumbled up, that I can't keep up anymore. Black is white, white is black and yellow has become the new black. Up is down and down is up, ouch! Anarchy and lawlessness, has permeated candy-cotton lawns and cute Popsicle fences.
Therefore, everything in between, is in a state of constant quandary as to where to settle. I mean, it is hard to watch all that I know crumpled viciously. And my childhood dreams, recklessly tampered with. How did I arrive at this point? Of a seemingly hopeless and fatal condition, you may be asking. A situation that bespeaks finality.
Well... What had happened was.... I was on my way, to an audition the other day. And I had to do my usual, 'Manhattan street speed maneuver'. As I jumped over fire-hydrants and swerved past whistling construction workers. All the while, politely side-stepping tourists, who had sealed of pedestrian side-walks. So they could count, the windows on the sky-scrapers. I was understandably out of breath, until I saw the unthinkable. It was a vision, that almost knocked any remaining breath out of me. I actually, was almost falling face forward. When a kind stranger, caught me... Sweet!
Strange as it may seem, I saw Superman eating a hot dog. His cape was strewn on the curb, as he munched away. Right next to him, was Tweety. And she was embroiled in an argument, over $2 and a presumed stolen snapshot. As if that was not enough, Minnie Mouse walked right by on the arms of Elmo (the blue one!). Miss Piggy could be seen passing out flyers, a few feet away. I was dumbstruck and on the verge of collapse again. So I decided to at least, try to rectify the situation. Therefore, I stepped in and started my speech.
This was not how it was supposed to be, I began. This is not how I was taught, as a child. And this is certainly not, what the manual said. Superman, cannot be stuffing his face with food. While people were stuck, on the roof of a burning building. Tweety was not to be harassing the masses, at the 'Square of the Times'. Minnie Mouse, should have been hanging with Mickey Mouse. Elmo could have stayed, with the color red. And Miss Piggy? Since when, was Miss Piggy all nice and giving? This girl (me) had seen enough heart wrenching scenarios, for a lifetime. The end was indeed here!
The next thing you know, Snow White will marry a frog. Cinderella will don black cowboy boots. And the Seven Dwarfs, will run for Mayor of the 'Square'. The thought alone is quite excruciating.
As I gave my completely ignored intervention speech, at the 'Square'. Donald Duck, rudely waddled right across the street. I stopped mid-sentence to ask: "Excuse Mr. Duck, why are you crossing the street while I am speaking?" His cruel and obnoxious reply: "To get away from you".
Very nice, coming from an aimless and clumsy waddler. I can almost see tomorrow's HEADLINE NEWS; Why did the duck cross the street? To get away from Chioma Onwudiwe.
That is so mean and twisted and I remain offended.
The end, as I knew it.
.